whingewhingewine

Bit windy on this tractor

Went out for a curry last night. Got in slightly worse for wear and took a selfie for some reason, possibly to show off my new top. Have just realised it looks like I'm fondling the dog and she is not enjoying it at all. That side eye though. Brutal.

The light is pretty nice this evening. Dare I whisper the words 'spring is here'...? Have a nice weekend 🥂

Bought a jumper from Vinted for my daughter. Was not in fact an age 12, but a size 12. So now I have a glittery panda jumper. 🐼

Just wanted to say how flipping lush this @lighthousestyle coat that I was sent for my Mother's Day gift guide is. I was discussing signs of middle age earlier on Facebook and being QUITE so delighted with a full length waterproof coat has to be up there, doesn't it. I'm not scared of you, rain. (My daughter said the cape shoulders make me look a bit like the grim reaper which isn't very nice of her).

Happy Mother's Day ❤️ To all those whose toddlers brought them play doh in bed at 6.34am, it gets better. If you raise them right, there will be a day when they insist on 'taking you' to a pub for dinner to celebrate. ...You never know, in another 8 years, they might even get a round in 🤞🏼

There has been a bit on the news today about scientists discovering a gene that makes labradors susceptible to getting chunky. It makes them more hungry, and their bodies burn off fewer calories than those without the gene. I believe not only that my labrador Izzy has this gene (her dad was a UNIT), but that maybe I am a labrador too. As you can see from the pictures, Izzy is not pleased at this news (although it explains a lot...). She quite rightly thinks all labradors are beautiful, however chonky. However, Izzy is an absolute dustbin, even in comparison to her labrador friends. No matter when her last meal, she'll happily hoover up anything she could possibly interpret as being food, no shits given and damn the consequences. She does not see going for a walk as exercise, but as a chance to forage for hedge snacks or whatever other disgusting things she can find to eat; fox crap, mud, discarded tissues. She remembers the location of each find and revisits the scene; the mighty baguette alley, the magical porkpie hedge, the beguiling cheese sandwich bin. She recalls every dog walker who has ever been foolish enough to share a treat with her. She is never full and to my knowledge has never turned her nose up at anything (with the exceptions of plain cooked rice, and celery). Keeping her fit and healthy takes a lot of willpower. She has very sad, pleading eyes and will patiently observe you for hours if she thinks she'll get a crust out of it. Fortunately I hate sharing. I also take her on an average of two hours of walks a day. Today it was a three and a half hour walk because the weather was good and I didn't have a lot on, which is nice if you can do it. It was very, very hard when she was in season and on the lead. Despite having a big garden, she simply will not chase a ball or a stick or do any exercise she doesn't have to. She's the world's most rubbish retriever. Anyway she would like it to be known that, greedy genes aside, she is a Very Good Girl and that scientists can be judgy bastards can't they? Also, please could I finish writing this and make her tea, please?

***WIN!*** I have another lovely Mother's Day giveaway!  This Ivy Branch solar and mains powered light from Idyll Home has 96 warm white LED lights which can be powered by the mains or, if it’s outside or near a window, by solar power. It comes with cable tacks to place it on the wall; simply unfurl the cable and the ‘branches’ and you can place it however you like. Initially it was destined for the garden, but when it arrived I decided it would go well in my son’s jungle-themed room with hanging ivy, so that’s where it ended up and it looks fab! The Ivy Branch Light Chain costs £39 from @IdyllHome. They also stock a whole range of beautiful homewares, lighting and accessories which would make for great Mother’s Day presents.  For a chance to #win an Ivy Branch Light Chain; 1) Follow this account (@whingewine)  2) Follow @idyllhome 3) Like this post and tag a friend! The winner will be chosen at random and notified after the competition has closed at midnight on Sunday 24th March. Sorry, this is for the UK only. T&Cs apply (see website for details).

I know you'll all appreciate a happy ending: It turns out that the guarantee on my @swanbranduk air fryer was not one but two years. So I have a new one and it's the same idiotproof model as before, just in a new snazzy colour. LOVE. Balance is once again restored. (The initial air fryer was gifted for review over a year ago. I'll put a link in stories...)

Eight kids. A metric fucktonne of sugar. So much noise. Popcorn everywhere. Thank god I'm medicated 🎉

***WIN!*** The MAJORITY Bard Internet Radio System is one of the brilliant gifts I've included in my Mother's Day Gift Guide, and I have one to give away! I love Podcasts. I listen when I'm exercising, I listen when I'm walking the dog and when I'm meant to be working. The MAJORITY Bard Internet Radio System allows me to effortlessly stream my favourite podcasts and listen to DAB radio stations directly from the unit using the included remote control, or via my smartphone. It is also possible to stream music from Spotify using a connected smartphone.   It is a nice, sleek looking unit which displays the time when not in use and would be perfect for a kitchen or bedroom - you can use the Bard as a radio alarm clock too.  To #win one worth £152.95,  1) Follow this account (@whingewine) 2) Follow @majorityaudio 3)  Like this post and tell me what your favourite podcast or radio station is! It would also be great if you shared or tagged your friends! The winner will be chosen at random and notified after the competition has closed at midnight on Sunday 17th March. Sorry, this is for the UK only. T&Cs apply (see website for details). Do check out the Mother's Day Gift Guides on my website for more fantastic giveaways!

The very, very sad face of someone whose air fryer has decided to give up on them mid jacket potato. Why God, whyyyyyyyyyyy???? Please help me, kind people: Do I need a new one with all sorts of bells and whistles or shall I just accept my fate and be glad I now have an oven that works? #hotairfryerchat #middleageproblems

I thought my new PJs were pretty damn snazzy, if a little familiar. Now cannot unsee. (Gifted by @britishboxers for my Mother's Day Gift Guide which I *really* need to get my bum in gear and actually write)

[Gifted] It's officially #margaritamonth and you can get a £6 margarita (including the blackberry marg which was 👌👌👌) at @wahaca if you sign up on their website on the margarita month club link (will pop into stories) 🍹 I bloody love a Wahacas, it appeals to my sense of FOMO because you can try loads of different dishes. We went for the favourites set menu; my favourite was the chorizo quesadillas and the cauliflower wings were amazing. Not ashamed to say we didn't have any leftovers 💪 Thank you @passportandpixels for the excellent company and thanks to our waitress who was just lovely. Dress from @amazon Necklace gifted by @xanderkostromalifestyle

Gifted entry: Day five of the half term and I hate to boast but we actually nailed it today. It was a beautiful day and we were lucky that we'd booked a review trip to the new adventure play park at @blenheimpalace (it probably wouldn't have been very much fun in the rain we've been having...). We even managed a look inside and round the formal gardens. Makes my house look totally rubbish in comparison. Will definitely go back for a closer look as the tickets last all year. Shame we had to take all our poos home with us. Hahahaha (well, the kids thought it was funny). Stay tuned for a proper review once these darn kids go back to school and I can get some actual work done. I've not even been in my office to feed the fish this week let alone write anything. Oops.