themotherhub.ie

All the wise and experienced folk who write parenting books give untold amounts of advice on all stages and aspects of your newborn baby’s life. Too late, and they will scream with all the might their little lungs can manage, and you will stand by the cot frantically rubbing their back and shushing them without making eye contact. I am blessed to have raised my children in the time of the iPhone, so instead of staring into the dark night for hours at a time, I was able to improve my mind by reading classic works of literature on the Kindle app. Of course, I made excellent use of this time by scrolling mindlessly through the burning cesspit of outrage and other people’s ghastly opinions that is Twitter.

There’s a show on Netflix where 5 beautiful men go into someone’s life and breathe love into it. It’s true that we should make the most of the time given to us , because it can be snatched away at any time, but it is also true that we need to pay bills, do grocery shopping, stack dishwashers and other non-joy squeezing activities. So it’s not about living a life of constant kitten stroking but identifying spaces where you can let joy in. It’s also about identifying what your own joy is, because it looks different for everyone, and as we all know comparison is the thief of joy.

This is a summer of endings and beginnings, of lasts and firsts, as my youngest child leaves the creche she has attended since she was 11 months old, to begin school at the end of August. It began with her last day in creche at the end of June, where she had made her first friends, kids with whom she spent most of her days, they became almost like family. The Montessori teacher gathered her class together, then they stood in a circle holding hands and sang ‘Happy Last Day She’s a sociable little mite, but as she didn’t know any of the other kids going in there, I thought she might be a little nervous.

I never used to do that, but now, yes I agree life is too short to plough on with a book you’re not enjoying. You may also notice the fetching Spider-Man bedspread. I am banished to Jake’s room : have finally abandoned the sitting on the floor when Rachel falls asleep routine , but haven’t progressed to being allowed downstairs yet. There is a noisy movie being watched in my room , so here I am, with Deborah Levy and Spider Man.