makemommygosomethingsomething.com

Nothing ruins your nice cup of coffee quite like a pair of Canadian Cobra Chickens who just flew up on the side walk trying to assert dominance by squawking at you. Never look at them in the eye or make sudden movements

My jaw hurt from keeping quiet. The burly doctor stood above me with my file rolled angrily in his hand

My dad claims that he turns the heat up when I come over because of “that Raymond disease or Ray’s disease or whatever it is I don’t know what turning the heat up means because it still feels like I’m sitting in a morgue. No, I am left handed but when I was in school, the nuns beat my hand black and blue until I used my right hand. You’re left handed!

Nothing is more comforting than being validated that you look like shit when you feel like shit. Oh your sister’s hair. but the fact that we were going to change my hair because she got a haircut that looked like MINE already made me a little miffed. She spun me wildly in the chair and asked me how Shawn and Chunky would like my hair short