Plenty of Fish

Rejection – nobody wants to be on either side of it. Everyone knows it’s a horrible feeling to be rejected, but what people don’t talk about is how hard it is to be the one doing the rejecting

It’s not wrong to have desires, needs and requirements, and there’s definitely nothing wrong with wanting your love interest or partner to fulfill those needs, however when it becomes a demand, the vibe gets killed, especially when it’s too early on in your relationship. If you’re in a relationship you hold one another accountable for certain roles, which is understandable but instead of losing it when your partner doesn’t do something you expect them to do (dishes from the night before), remember they aren’t perfect. You’re assuming if they aren’t doing all of these things or saying, they don’t like you enough or can’t give you what you want. If a relationship is one sided with effort, if after spending a significant amount of time with someone they aren’t showing up for you or bringing to the table what you can’t be without, and they’re unwilling to change, that’s when you know it’s over.

If this time of year is a recurring nightmare for you, like it is for me, it’s time you ask for a little help in this department, instead of putting it off until the very last day (April 15th). If you don’t like relying on a credit card, you can also choose to open up a shared account that you can each pool money into every paycheck. If you’re not sure where to start, you can categorize your monthly expenses and spreadsheet like this: • This usually includes things like groceries, wellness, transit, eating out, entertainment, shopping, gifts, credit card payment and travel etc.

Instead of getting wrapped up in the romance of sparking an old flame, it’s important to slow down and ask yourself a couple of important questions to identify whether or not this relationship is actually one you want to invest in. If this is the second or third time your relationship has ended, it’s probably a good indication there shouldn’t be a third or fourth attempt at making things work. If you’re like me, and love a good visual to understand the big picture, grab a piece of paper and write down why you and your partner broke up in the first place and assess the severity of the situation. If it’s one-sided, you have to understand that the relationship is over for the other person and that it’s important you move on as well.