Holly Elizabeth

The problem with early recovery is that your brain is still stuck in the dark corners of your eating disorder and those corners are closing in attempting to trap you because you’re suddenly going against every disordered impulse you have. But then you begin recovery and it’s like rewinding a tape, your body gets better before your mind. In recovery my mind was alert, but I had meal plans to fit around socialising, I had an intense shame connected to letting go and failing at being anorexic and a hatred of my body so intense that I couldn’t bare for people to see me. But slowly, as recovery moves on and the weeks stretch into months and the months stretch in your brain gets stronger.

The first post on a new blog is supposed to set you up for what’s to come, which in my case will probably be rambling chaos with little nuggets of possibly useful information. I think I want this to be a place where I can be more in depth about my life and hopefully in the future when I’ve learned what the hell I’m doing, a place where you can find solid information and a sense of community. I also think this blog will be the place that shows anyone who’s told me that I should write a book exactly why I absolutely shouldn’t do that. Having said that, I’m excited to go down this new avenue and hopefully have you guys come along for the ride with me because when it comes down to it this blog is here because of you.