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"Are you here for the thing?" he asked, pointing at the crowd of people who were gathered at this location. And you know where it was
"There are hardly any brothas here.""But there are White guys," I pointed out, nodding to a group of casually dressed White men dancing off-beat to a rap song."Girl stop," she said chuckling, nibbling on a meatball. I do have close Black female friends that are married to Black men, but I have so many single Black homegirls that are lonely and giving up. Looking at the White men in the room, as nice as they seemed, made me think of the White athletes from high school that acted like they owned the place with their arrogance and poor attitudes."Naw," I said, "I'm just here to have fun."For the rest of the evening, I watched a really cute Asian girl dancing with a group of White guys, smiling from ear to ear. I realized then that Jamaica might have been right: if Black women no longer wished to be single, they were going to have to be willing to mix and mingle with men that are not Black.
There are men dealing with divorce, men in relationships that think they are single, men still living with their exes to save money, men with side pieces, men with secret children, men with whole secret families, men who only want to date barely legal women, men who want to be Peter Pan. But I am finding that the biggest obstacle facing single 30-something women is fighting that sometimes all-consuming urge to settle. For my single homegirls inching towards 35, it can cause them to do things like entertain losers that they are completely too good for. If you are single, the urge to entertain that late night text pall that wants to come over and watch a movie at midnight may be very strong.