abedformyheart.com

Why is it beautiful and moving when a whale grieves the loss of her baby, but people find it revolting when a human mother grieves the loss of her child? We need to show the same compassion for humans grieving the loss of their precious loved ones as we’re showing this mama whale– instead of rushing them to move on, get over it, stuff their sorrow– while we eagerly stuff endless cliches down their throats and wonder why no one is feeling “better We need to acknowledge and validate one another’s pain. We need people to understand that the ache in our hearts is directly proportional to how much we love our child.

It’s time to bust a long-standing myth about child loss and grief. It does not even begin to capture or express the reality of our day-to-day lives, nor the eternal ache and love in our hearts. To understand child loss, you have to think about every second, minute, hour, day, month and year a bereaved parent has to live their precious child– It is a loss that spans a bereaved parent’s entire life.

Then I daydreamed about the next time someone clichés all over me– instead of nodding and smiling while crying inside, or kindly educating them about a more comforting and helpful way to talk to a bereaved parent– I’d have enough grit and grace to recite this instead. Easy for you to say — if you haven’t had to hold your dead child’s hand inside the curves of your living one. Instead of trite clichés, try offering a hug instead, say their child’s name, or ask about their favorite memory of their precious child. Angela’s writing and her book have comforted the hearts of millions of grieving parents around the world.