Grief and Loss

Every holiday shared in the kitchen with music blaring which never seemed to be louder than any of the off pitch singing and every Christmas Eve in the living room in front of the fireplace with family, friends and every stray college student from the university that Daddy had heard couldn’t make it home for the holiday. Angel took another deep breath and opened the book and the first page made her smile as she rubbed her fingers across his handwriting on the In Case of Loss Page which read Angel Lee and the home address. I want you to know that daddy loves you on days that I will not be able to tell you and know that you are never alone as long as your heart beats. I love every little thing about and know sweet little girl that you made daddy happier than the morning sun.

THIS potential of happiness looms right in front of his face, often in his thoughts and is sometimes heard from lips once kissed on a regular basis. From lips to ears his desire slips from the history had and all those great times caressing limbs of what use to be. THAT doesn’t affectionately speak his love language. THIS wants to feed his cravings, nurture his gratification while fulfilling him to satisfaction.

and it was met with an excuse knowing that people make time for the things (people) that they desire. Sometimes he kissed her like he wanted forever with her. There came a time when she did.calls her beautiful like it’s her name. There came a time that her worth became priority to her and her time was of the essence.

From clenched chest to slow labored breaths attempting to catch the next rapidly growing labored breath. Slow deep breaths with a long labored exhale of attempt. and it is easy to get consumed with wondering how you’re going to be able to carry on without your loved one or it may be the deep painful hurt. It is not having to have to say anything because God saw fit and knew that it was very necessary to have the right people in place in life for all the moments and especially the losses of loved ones.

so she is in charge of running the offense on the field but will listen to him in the huddle, HB to run the ball, FB for muscle with the ball, WR to catch while running all while maintaining her TE of course as an added bonus. better looking, better smelling, better tasting… younger, darker, lighter, shorter, taller, thicker, fuller, bigger, tighter… Longer hair, bigger lips, smaller body, more muscles, fatter ass, plumper tits, thicker penis… HUMAN NATURE. There are some men that have an awesome franchise player on their team but they are spending way too much time looking into the free agency and trying to see who is coming up on the draft. Team building takes time and getting to know each other’s strengths, weaknesses and how to find a workable balance is sometimes hard work that is a process.

Not to mention that this book which has now turned into more than one book that has been edited a time or four and shelved to being back in my spirit strongly. I like to tell stories, good stories that may encourage thoughts and even a dialogue. I write stories that need to be shared. share some stories, have some conversations and prepare myself to complete this book(s) that I have been writing for about 10 years and hopefully build a following.

For those that may be struggling today, a reminder from the soul: Instead of looking at emotions as something to shift, feel them as a part of who you truly are in energy. An example might be when a repeating pattern arises, an energy or emotion is triggered in you, instead of trying to release it (remember its a part of you), place your hand upon the heart, and speak to the heart saying, “even though I am feeling By establishing love practices that allow us to integrate what we feel, the energy itself becomes a transformative agent in that it is being heard, acknowledged, and loved, which is the root issue in any shift we desire to fulfill. Whether for resolve in healing, or exploration of something new, possibly just simply to express who we are from a deeper level, each experience we have is purposeful in nature— which also opens our humanity to the abundance of the universe manifestationally.

The denials of humanity, forward progress, empowerment, circumstances and/or love in life and simply just being. Her that struggles day in and day out to just be present and available to carry all the bags through life with a smile on her face most times. Her that has had to wear all the hats of Mother/Father and even the ones that weren’t mature enough to allow the father to be the father. Her that wants to give up and/or give in because the weight of the world and the weight of her life are too heavy to carry.

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